When you were born, so was I.

What is it about birthdays that cause all moms (I’m lumping all y’all in here with me!) to momentarily lose their sanity? And who else likes to torture themselves by looking at all the birth photos and baby books? Okay, “torture” may be a little too strong of a word, because I truly love it! However, it never comes without tears.
Judah turned six on Monday! Like most, I can hardly wrap my head around how that happened so quickly. And for some reason six has me feeling like it’s harder because it seems like the last “little” boy birthday, but who am I kidding? Every birthday brings a little struggle. Though it also brings excitement, and he is so proud to be six years old!
I use to wonder what he’d look like, sound like, like to do, who he’d play with etc. when the “baby” went away,  and it is one of my biggest joys to discover those things with all of my boys! I am so thankful for the whole journey- even the birthday struggle.
Reminiscing  in the days leading up to Judah’s birthday made me think about how it’s somewhat difficult to remember life before I was a mom, and how my life seemed so much more purposeful when I became one. I started to think about how my biggest desire was always to be a wife and a mom. It made me realize that when a baby is born, his/her birth isn’t the only one that occurs.

When You Were Born, So Was I

When you were born, so was I 

One minute the same, the next, something new 

The birth of a mother, at the very sight of you

A new beginning, a love I’d never known

Dreams realized from prayers sewn 

You are everything I wanted, but didn’t know I’d need 

More than just my son, 

you were a missing part of me 

Like a budding rose, enclosed, waiting to open bloom 

She erupted wildly, fully blossomed, from a different sort of womb 

Though I didn’t know her yet, she was always a part of me

And because of you, she became who I was always meant to be 

You were the first to call me mommy 

My new, forever name,

And with that transformation,

I would never be the same 

Oh, that smile and oh, those eyes

and  I’m just thankful that you’re mine

Everlasting gratitude, never-ending love, 

Always for my son, but first to God, above

All the wonder He delivered me, in one precious little face, 

a testament to His faithfulness, His infinite, matchless grace 

I could’ve never known to ask for, all He had to give 

Because when I became your mother, it taught me how to live 

I gave you birth, but you gave me life

When you were born, so was I